Confession Point

When you must confess!

8th grade was amazing… I moved to a new country, had a girlfriend, and was pretty much cool with life! Things changed earlier that year when I was in a cab going home and the driver took a detour and abused me sexually. I think i could have stopped it but at the time i was just so shocked that i didnt know what to do…

I never told anyone… things that crossed my mind that my parents would be upset with me… i dont know why they would but its still there…

another thing is the place i was living deals on a lot of taboo in a bad way so it wouldnt be good for me

me and my girlfriend broke up, and now at 20, i have not had a real girlfriend, and also i have no idea if i even like girls or guys, complicated but i dont know… how am i supposed to figure out things!?!?!

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9 Comments

  1. Jesus_Is_The_Answer
    4:14 am on January 26th, 2009

    Ok well 1st off not to put the sexual assualt aside but can I ask how you are unsure if you like male/female? I mean is that because you like both and are trying to choose one sex you like more, or is it because you don’t really like either right now?

  2. Fra
    12:13 pm on January 26th, 2009

    You know, things like that let us know that when there are no answers, JESUS is the answer.

    Give it all to Him, if you don’t believe it…ask Him to give you on proof if He really existed.

    Only His love can change your thoughts and your life!

    You’re male, you’re supposed to like female…but if you have doubts don’t rush yourself into liking no one, turn your life over to Jesus and He’ll take care of you.

    Tell Jesus to come live in your heart and help you out…no need for big words, He understands you…

    He changed ME…

    GOD bless you

  3. Jack
    4:21 pm on January 28th, 2009

    I’m sorry to hear that you were abused. It’s very sad and you must get help. You should find a councillor who can help sort out your grieving and anger. Depression is a result of suppressed anger. The person that did this to you should be arrested -still, everyday that you spend on seeking vengence-is another day that he robs you.

    I think that you also need to forgive that person, and perhaps forgive yourself. Sexsuality is not concrete: you may be attracted to men for reasons which are more spiritual that physical.

    The first thing you would need to know is: what was your relationship with your father like? People sometimes seek to repair the inadequcies of their parent relations through sex. Also it is not unusual for men and women to experiment earlier in life. Look back on your life: with whom were you most happy?

    G.B.Y.

  4. energetic step-mother
    5:16 am on January 29th, 2009

    Having a sexual assault like that can really confuse you about your sexuality… As for myself, I know that I am naturally bi but because I was sexually abused by a woman as a child I feel overwhelmed by women so I choose men… but I am not as attracted to men in general, only certain men… If that makes sense… I feel overwhelmed by women and choose not to be lovers with them even though I find them attractive.

  5. athletic cockroach
    1:53 pm on January 30th, 2009

    Organised religion is a load of crap

  6. Purple Bike
    7:47 am on February 7th, 2009

    I’m sorry that that happened to you. I think you need to seek help. You are probably suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder, especially since it sounds like you haven’t told anybody about this. In which case, sex is going to confusing fullstop, I can’t really explain why, but when something like that happens it screws how you see sex, etc. You need to find a theraphist and talk about it and deal with what happened, then worry about this whole sexual orientation stuff.

  7. keepin it real
    9:22 pm on March 26th, 2009

    Jack, energenic step-mother & purple bike ALL have valid points. I agree you should DEFINATELY seek counciling. Sexual abuse as a child DOES cause several repercussions as an adult, as well as alot of confusion. Being that you have never told anyone you have never gotten past it. You NEED to talk to someone, there are several places you can go for the help you need that are free & confidential. Victims Resource Center has a great staff on hand & is COMPLETELY confidential!! Most of the counclers are victims of sexual assult aswell so can completely understand & relate to your feelings & emotions. I didnt believe anyone could until I experienced it!! I had issues with trust & did not want to talk about my assualt but after meeting with the same councler over several months I finally began my healing. I suffered from some similar issues & was not aware that my sexual assult as a child had play SUCH a large part in my adult life. You do have the power to stop being a victim of circumstances. Best of luck to you! God Bless!

  8. Cactrot
    8:09 am on August 26th, 2009

    Fra
    12:13 pm on January 26th, 2009
    You know, things like that let us know that when there are no answers, JESUS is the answer.

    What the fuck are you talking about? If there are no answers, how is Jesus?

    Stupid religious people.

  9. BloodKitsune
    11:11 am on October 31st, 2009

    Everyone needs something they can rely on. If its not humanity they find religion. I’ve seen too many fucked-up “Christians” myself to agree with the sentiment but they do have the right to offer their opinion. And the problem with orientation is generally that you tend to flashback on the experience when your in intimate situations. Or if it’s the first sexual situation you’ve been exposed to (usually this pertains to those at a prepubescent age) you flashback whenever you have any feelings of arousal or even interest. Not something you can ever really make peace with but, with the grace of whatever may be out there, you may forget most of it.

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