Confession Point

When you must confess!

That’s right. I’m actually out of my teens (truth be told, I’m also well on my way to turning 21, which would make me an adult pretty much anywhere around the globe), I’ve finished high school, and I’m starting my second year of university.

And yet, the one and only kiss I’ve ever received from a girl was at a “spin-the-bottle” game in junior high.

Why?

Well, partly, because I’m unlucky…as pathetic as that might sound. I was absolutely crazy about one girl in my first two years of high school, and during that time at least two nice girls confessed that they had feelings for ME…not knowing that I was busy drooling after another gal. As fate would have it, I got to know one of these girls quite well over the following year…and I started to feel more and more attracted to her, just as quickly as she began to see us as “just friends”. And so on and so forth.

Partly, I’m quite sure, because I’m a fool.

I can’t seem to develop romantic feelings for a girl until I’ve gotten to know her a bit…which is, coincidentally, when you tend to enter the “friend-zone”. At that point, before it’s too late, you either tell her how you feel or you just slip into a comfortable, painless friendship.

And being a coward and a gutless idiot, I’ve yet to tell a girl that I like her, in said moment.

Now? Again, I’m in my second year of university. My friends have all had multiple relationships, some of which have actually been pretty damned serious. Several of them are now so comfortable with the ladies that they can walk into a club/disco and find a chick to get busy with each and every single time. They know what to say to a girl, how to entertain her, how to please her.

Me? All I’ve got down are the awkward jokes and subsequent silences. The small talk…GOD, I hate it.

Seriously: if a girl walked up to me at a pub, told me that she thought I was gorgeous, and that she wanted to kiss me…instead of jumping up and down for sheer joy, I’d probably be pissing my pants. Why? Because I CAN’T KISS WORTH A SH*T, unless I’ve got a crapload of innate talent for it.

Which of course makes the prospect of going out on a first date even MORE daunting. What am I supposed to do? I’m twenty, getting to first base should be almost AUTOMATIC. Trouble is, the real goal should be GETTING SOME, at this point.

But me? I’d be happy with one, miserable kiss. NO TONGUE, for gawd’s sake, or I might have a stroke here.

You know you’re pretty damned depressing when your hypothetical best-case scenario is some secluded area with a chick so drunk off her ass that she won’t notice what a slobby kisser you are :/

And what gets me is that I KNOW that I’m not repulsive, or ugly, or even unfit. I’m six feet tall, in moderate shape. I’ve been told a few times that I’m not entirely bad to look at.

I dunno…I guess I just wanted to get this off my chest. Hopefully, this’ll have some therapeutic effect, and by tomorrow I’ll be screwing like a bunny on viagra 😀

Seriously though…if anyone, ANYONE has every gone through anything like this, send a few words of wisdom my way, please.

Thanks for reading.

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15 Comments

  1. Ranius
    5:21 pm on October 21st, 2008

    it’s true that for the most part experience is worth a lot. but that doesn’t mean that there’s no hope. i was a bad kisser myself (and i can’t say that i’m ground-shaking now) but i’ve gotten better by reading. it’s funny how much that can help. there’s a few sites on the net where you can get basic advice on how to do things. i had a distance problem with my girlfriend so i had to find out without cheating on her. i fuond a site that had some good advices. it might still be operational, so if you feel that you still need help in that area you can check it out. however, getting close to women and getting laid is a whole other story. i would advise you to follow only the most basic instructions (per say when not to say something).

    or, you can go out and try everything you think might work. =P you’ll fail, sure, but if you’ve got the stomach for it you will get 1st hand xp on it. =P

    good luck. ^^

  2. forgetful snake
    1:25 am on October 22nd, 2008

    You should not feel so bad about it. Kissing, sex, love, dating, it all takes practice. Hang in there, and don’t be scared. Girls don’t bite (not too hard usually anyway,) and you just need to relax a little bit. “First base” certainly isn’t automatic. Friends first is best anyway.

  3. Xeslana
    6:28 am on October 23rd, 2008

    Look take your advise from me * a girl * . Spread this story around with the ladies and you’ll have a flock ready to line up and fix you up but good. Me included. It would be an honor to give you the 101 on making out from A to Z.

  4. Me
    12:38 pm on October 25th, 2008

    You’re putting the pussy on a pedestal, just remember they’re humans too and they may well be in the same/similar position. And you shouldn’t even care what they think.

  5. Cloud
    5:06 am on October 27th, 2008

    Fuck being friends at first bullshit! only leads to awkwardness in my opinion and if you can’t kiss, then skip that shit like me and go straight to second.
    for example, I went out with this girl twice, the first time was to meet for the very first time for dinner only talking calmly, cracking jokes here and there, just being friendly and not even thinking about fucking her or complimenting her in any way!…
    so anyway, we both had a fun time at dinner just getting to know each other while drinking beer/ smirnoff or whatever.. if eveything goes right, she mention something like we should do this again.
    so i said “how about this friday?” which was only 2 days away. she said okay and one that day we went to the movies, played pool and then to her house and the only thing I remember was me saying “so do I look as Fit in real life as I do in the pictures you seen of me?” so she was like, your gonna have to take off your shirt for me to see clearly. and so I did. next thing you know, I was laying on her, started to kiss her neck, licking and eventually sucking it for a few minutes until she started to moaning and breathing harder. after that I slowly slipped my hands in ther pants and started rubbing and then fingering her pussy. kept doing it for a few minutes until she really got wet down there. once the pussy got really wet, I stripped her pants off and fucked the shit out of her! how do I know she wanted it?! well, if a girl moans and gets wet down there, its an automatic yes! please fuck me now!.. so point being… I nevered kissed her once! not even on the cheeks. kissing is overrated anyways, so fuck it!

  6. Mi Nombre es el Hombre
    12:31 pm on October 28th, 2008

    Listen, dude: you’re a nice guy, and that’s part of your problem. Women aren’t wired to have feelings for men they establish as friends. It happens, but it’s not the norm. The idea of buddying up to a pretty girl in the hopes of “becoming more” is a bad, inefficient, and heartbreaking one.

    Have a drink and sit down in front of your computer. Head to craigslist.org (make sure it’s local) and make a personal: explain that you’re an average-looking guy that just needs a bit of a how-to in terms of talking to women, or maybe even kissing. The fact that you’re honest and approachable will definitely get you some responses, and it opens up the road to talking to girls who are interested in you.

    Don’t sign up for an internet site like Match.com or Eharmony. Just put a good ‘ol craigslist ad up, BE HONEST, and wait for a caring, sweet girl to respond.

  7. ay ay yo
    6:40 pm on November 4th, 2008

    hey man i feel the same way bout this girl i went to hs with it drives me crazy seeing her with other guys but you have to be persistant thats what i did helped me out….. not really haha best thing to do is to get her off your mind and go have fun !

  8. freudster
    7:14 pm on November 6th, 2008

    Cloud,
    could you really be a Tantric Sex guru?
    Answers on a postcard please.

  9. freudster
    7:46 pm on November 6th, 2008

    Some advice my friend…
    as someone considerably older at 34. and someone whom can identify wholeheartedly with what was that gaping void from going from ‘friends being friends being friends becoming lovers’. I could never feel out for that one. Then boom. Your 30. Mate, now I’m a straight guy who has far more beautiful female friends than ugly male ones (sorry Cloud)
    Friendships can be just as stronger a bond as relationships. Sex is to ‘savour’ too not ‘quaver’ too. Add a few more digits onto your years and love will be painting many a picture.
    And don’t be so judgemental on yourself. Your creative, create!

  10. Cloud
    5:14 am on November 7th, 2008

    freudster, Having beautiful girls as friends is like a dick tease man! come on.. if I find a girl Hot, she’s either going to be my offical Girlfriend/ or one nightstand, or simply not in my life at all… this is my personal preferrence…
    I had hot girl Friends back then and its nothing but temptation all around you, not to mention how your girlfriend gets all noisy and jealous as fuck just because you do have hot friends.
    so I’d stick with the Boom, Bam, thank you mam!

  11. Italian Stallion
    12:34 pm on December 1st, 2008

    Wow. Lotta answers.

    Thanks for filling me in, folks. I’ll try to take in what you guys have tried to tell me, here.

    Cloud, you’re awesome, whether that story is true or not 😀

    Mi Nombre, your answer was probably the most…therapeutic one. Probably the one I’ll be counting on the most. Thanks.

    Xelsana…heheh. You wouldn’t happen to be planning a trip to Rome any time soon, would you? :p Clever way of boosting my hopes, at any rate. Thank you, too.

  12. cloud
    5:16 am on December 5th, 2008

    Thanks… and for the record, what I told you is all real man. Never told anybody I know yet, except here. cause’ why make yourself a potential crime scene when nobody suspects anything! WOHAHAH!..

  13. Funky Bugs
    7:23 pm on November 17th, 2009

    Oh damn, don’t worry that much about it. I’m a girl, and I could tell you that normal girl, not bar whore, don’t care about such a thing.

    All my boyfriend ’til then where guys like you. Never kiss a girl before, etc… and you know what? I didn’t cared. When you click whit someone, when you have good communication and complicity, you’re able to overcome that. ‘Cause this is the kind of things you need to learn. Personnally, now that I know a man who as the same experience as me, I could tell that I miss a little the good old times where I was the teacher…

    Back then, there was no fuckin’ ex to be jealous of! =D Wonderful… Hahaha!

    So don’t worry, I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one out there who don’t give a shit about a guy being a good kisser. There kinda cute, in a way…. 🙂

    Relax dude :). My boyfriend, and futur husband, was in the same situation as you when he was 19 (he’s now 26, and I’ve just turn 20) and (unfortunately for me :P) he got to have 3 girlfriends before me. And he’s kinda geek…

    So, better late than never, everything happen for something in this world.

    =)

  14. political martian
    7:47 pm on June 24th, 2010

    There comes a point in every mans life where he has to just jump.

    Nobody is comfortable when they are inexperienced, and the older you get, the more uncomfortable with your inexperience you become.

    You just have to man up and ignore your fears. If being a good kisser and a good lover is important to you, than it will happen, once you get the experience.

    And if a girl isn’t willing to help you grow in that way, well she wasn’t really worth a damn anyway, now was she?

  15. Italian Stallion
    2:29 am on June 25th, 2010

    …wow.

    Well, it’s been two years since I first wrote that article.

    And, truth be told, all the positive comments and advice you folks have dished out aside, back then I would have bet all I owned that in two years’ time I’d be in the exact same situation I’ve always been in.

    At the time, I also weighed around 100 kilos and felt pretty crappy about myself.

    Two years later…I can honestly say that I’ve been in a relationship with an entirely cute (if sligtly odd :p ) girl that I know, which has boosted my confidence CONSIDERABLY. Ok, sure, I’m not exactly crusing the nightlife and hitting clubs etc, but damn. I now know that I don’t simply REPEL women on a physical basis.

    It was a bit of a weird kind of relationship as well, but we had fun, and parted on good terms.

    Can’t wait to do it again with someone else!

    Seriously though, I went over some of the comments, and you guys are cool as HECK. Thanks so much for the support and kind words 🙂

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